i feel like..

were drifting apart )=

.. i miss the OLDOLD us, i hate fighting, i hate crying, i hate that were sometimes not happy, i hate how i disappoint you, i hate how i always make you mad, i hate how i never let you do things, i hate when we say we hate each other, i hate the feeling of wanting to break up, i hate when we hang up on each other, i hate when hit each other, i hate what we've became, i hate how this is what our relationship is, i hate knowing that one day you wont be able to take my shit and end it, i hate knowing that you could do so much better, but even tho i hate all those thing im not giving up on you, i'll fight for you if i have to. i want us to work, i want us to stay together forever, i want all the plans that we made to come true, i want you for the rest of my life.

Derek Abanilla, i love you so much <3

tired

this past week all i want to do is sleep sleep sleep "/

.. Freshmen retreat tomorrow.

headache

i cant believe our relationship really almost ended last night. but we worked it out as always and i love him so much. i really really really dont know what im going to do without him when we go to college. the only thing i can do is go to a cal state near him and hopefully i'll get into it, i cant stand being without him. i know i might be clingy but idunno maybe its because i dont want to lose him ever. all i can do right now is become a better girlfriend and not worry about the future but worry about what is happening now.

before i die i wanna meet jon and kate +8! (: